A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. He asks, “What was that for?” She says, “I found a piece of paper in your pocket with Betty Sue written on it.” He says, “Jeez, honey, remember last … Read more
At school, Little Johnny’s classmate tells him that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, so it’s very easy to blackmail them by saying, “I know the whole truth.” Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. Johnny’s mother greets him at home, and he tells her, “I know the whole … Read more
Little Johnny’s brother Fred married the love of his life, Mary. Unfortunately, they couldn’t afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred’s parent’s home for their first night together. In the morning, Little Johnny gets up and has his breakfast. Before going to school, he asks his Mom if Fred and Mary were up … Read more
A paperboy said to a customer one day, “Mr. Smith, I wish I had twenty customers like you.” “Gosh, that’s nice to hear,” said Smith, “but I’m kind of surprised considering I never tip you that well and always pay late.” The paperboy said, “I know, but I’d still like twenty customers like you. The … Read more
Jim strolls into the paint section of a Homebase and walks up to the assistant. “I’d like a pint of canary-coloured paint,” he says. “Certainly,” says the clerk. “Mind if I ask why you need it?” “My parakeet,” says Jim. “See, I want to enter him in a canary contest. He sings so sweetly that … Read more
For many of us, history is something that we took in school and we probably forgot more about what we learned in the class than what we remembered. It may not be the favorite subject for all of us, but there are some interesting things that can be learned from it. That includes what we … Read more
Mrs. Markowitz was walking along the beach with her grandson when suddenly a wave came and washed the three year old boy out to sea. “Oh, Lord!” cried the women. “If you will just bring that boy back alive I’ll do anything! I’ll be the best person! I’ll give to charity! I’ll go to temple! … Read more
People do puzzles for a wide variety of reasons. In some cases, they are just trying to pass the time and they are looking for something convenient that will help them to do so. That isn’t to say, however, that people only do puzzles because they are bored. Some people love puzzles so much that … Read more
Husband’s E-Mail To His Wife… A Sailor sent an e-mail to his wife, informing her that his ship would be returning from deployment a day early. Arriving home, he found his wife with another man. Upset, he stormed off and got a room at the Navy Lodge to decide what to do next. His thoughts … Read more
Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they’ll be admitted to Heaven. Unfortunately, there’s only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in. The Angel asks Dolly if there’s some particular reason why she … Read more
