Dudes have some opinions about your lady-behavior, and here they are.
Reddit user tennesseelamb asked the website’s users, “What turns you off a girl?” and the Reddit community had some opinions. I’ve gathered the top answers and listed them in below, in order of popularity. Word of caution: This is from Reddit, so please take it all with a grain of salt, and more importantly, just be yourself. I’m a fat weirdo who stares at her phone all day and sometimes speaks exclusively in rhyme (I’m the worst?) and I’m married to a wonderful dude who loves me because of those things, not in spite of them. So just do you, you awesome unicorn.
But now, onto the show! Here’s what turns (some) guys off:
1. Not being honest. This seems pretty basic. Trust is the most important thing in a relationship and if you don’t have that, you don’t have anything. This is Relationship 101. Next!
2. Excessive self-centeredness. It’s good to love yourself, but maybe try to refrain from making out with yourself in the mirror every morning. (Just some mornings.)
3. Pretending to be dumb to get attention. You’re not stupid, so don’t play.
4. Pretending to be clumsy. I guess not every dude wants to date a tipsy Zooey Deschanel. (Although, I will say, getting drunk with Zooey Deschanel is probably super fun. You can paint your nails 10 different pastel colors and you know she can do a mean braid.)
5. Being on your cell phone all the time. Someone else added, “In the same vein, actually caring about Snapchat or Instagram enough that it impedes real life.” Well, then, I guess I’ll never get a man, OH WELL. (J/K I’m married and my husband doesn’t give a shit.)
6. Trying to get him to act jealous. That said, I read a relationship advice book once that said it’s imperative to make a guy a little jealous so he’ll put a ring on it. I think Beyoncé wrote it.
7. Playing hard to get. I guess wanting a guy to work for it is a no-no? Although, honestly, if he isn’t willing to try a little, was it ever even worth it?
8. Lying about your wants. If you know where you want to eat, don’t tell him to decide and then pout when it’s not what you want. Just say you want Chipotle. You always want Chipotle. (Don’t worry, he does too.)
9. Narrow-mindedness. Seems fair. Judge not, lest you be judged, love everyone, just be chill, etc.
10. But also, being too open-minded. What can I say? Guys are complicated, emotional creatures. They don’t know what they want.
11. Helplessness. Men like women who can get shit done.
12. Treating your social media accounts like it’s your job. Although, to be fair, sometimes it is your job. And in that case, you really should treat it as so because being fired is not the greatest. If not, I guess you can close Instagram every once in awhile. If you want.
13. Not reciprocating things. An example from Reddit: “I was with my ex for 6 years and through those 6 years I helped her through her struggles with depression and self destruction. Fighting every step of the way. She always said she was so grateful and would do anything she could to help me if I ever had struggles. About 5 years into our relationship I started to develop obsessive behavior and rituals eventually got diagnosed with OCD and what they called ‘Mild Autism’. The second I walked out and told her I could see in her face that it bothered her. Fast forward to a year later I had a bad evening and I had brushed my teeth for a fourth time because I kept messing up how I put down my tooth brush. She looked at me disgusted and left that night to ‘Get a break from it.’ I have not seen her since or spoken to her.”
14. Not complimenting them. Sometimes dudes need to be told their butt doesn’t look big in those jeans. Toss a boy a compliment every once in a while.
15. Not being real. Don’t play games. Just be yourself and find a dude who likes you the way you are (and vice versa). Now that’s good advice.
